Dating is always a dangerous game to play. Racked with fear and uncertainty, it can be enjoyable (as it’s obviously meant to be!) but can also be shark-infested waters if the correct location isn’t established right at the start. Think back to how many first dates you’ve had since you first got in the game. If you’ve got lots of examples to think about then clearly you were doing something wrong. I’ve spent many a night with a bottle of red and Cookie Dough Ben & Jerry’s asking myself Why oh why did it go no further? After a long and depressing analysis of my ‘man history’ and that of those closest to me, I’ve noticed a pattern emerge which has enabled me to give you this advice. I haven’t hit 30 yet and I’m certainly no Carrie Bradshaw but think you should give some of these ideas a try!
1. Restaurant by the Sea – A romantic restaurant is an obvious choice I know, and you’re probably thinking that you knew this anyway but the restaurant location depends on the type of man. If your new man is a City Type and by city type I mean office man or generally some sort of work that involves computer use at some point then he’ll want a place that’s the complete antithesis of what he’s used to. Don’t go to a restaurant in the city otherwise, subconsciously, he’ll associate you with work and what he’s used to, instantaneously rendering you less new and exotic. Ideally, you need to be in an environment unfamiliar to you both so you can therefore form some instant bond.
2. Restaurant in the City – Now this would be for the opposite reason of the above. If you’re a lady who’s been lucky enough to bag a gorgeous bit of rough that works on the high seas then you generally want to steer clear of a restaurant too close to his workplace. If you’re a city gal then that helps too because you can take the lead and impress him with the best local haunts to go to and manipulate him into thinking that you are actually Samantha Jones incarnate (another Sex and the City reference – I apologise!) and really know your stuff. Plus, you get the best cocktails in the city. I’m a Pina Colada girl myself.
3. Live Gig – This is always a fun option, especially if your new guy is a musician himself. He’ll be relaxed and enthusiastic and enjoy the fact that he’s got the upper hand for a short time while he tries to impress you with his music knowledge. Unless you know your stuff too then try not to blag too much otherwise he WILL notice you’re trying too hard! Also, the genre of the gig is very important. You don’t want to go to rock night because you’ll spend about 3 hours having a conversation that goes exactly like this:
“This band’s awesome!”
“I said, THIS BAND’S AWESOME!”
“What? You’re a fan of threesomes?!”
Not really something you want to discuss on a first date is it! Go for a relaxed jazz night. It’s classy, enjoyable, and you won’t come across as a kinky freak! (Unless that’s your thing!)
4. Sci-Fi Convention – The chances of you actually going on this date are slim to none but I will prepare you just in case your new man is a) into comic books b) spends 23 out of 24 hours of the day playing his playstation or c) Thinks he’s been abducted by aliens and that Vampires really do exist. Whatever the convention, it’s always good to read up on the basics such as aliens, zombies, ghosts, vampires, witches and such – this doesn’t just mean watching Twilight beforehand and perving over Taylor Lautner! You need to be able to make comments such as, “I wonder if Zirk from the Glacticon’s Army will arrive on his molecule-altering ES19” and “Hang on, i’m off to get the autograph of Delia the Witch of Darkness before she heads back to conquer Eastern Europe!” Show your man you’re on bored with his girlfriend-time-hogging hobby at first and soon he’ll be putty in your hands, only playing his console to kill time on his private jet which he bought with the money he earned starting up a multi-million pound-making website. Fool-proof plan!
5. Twenty20 Match – Ahh now then, this is more like what I’m used to. This is the venue you could take a sports fanatic. The great thing about Twenty20 cricket is that you don’t have to be into cricket to enjoy it. Watching it live at the stadium is like being at a pub, a nightclub a cricket match and a music festival, all at the same time! There are quiet moments for you to chat and get to know each other, times when you can showcase your beautiful singing voice in the debilitating chants aimed at the poor fielder on the boundary line, moments when you can impress him with a random cricket-related comment that you learned from my book Point to Fine Leg (had to get a little plug there didn’t I!) and times when you’ve got so drunk on cider and black that all your deepest, darkest secrets come out in one foul swoop – always fun!
I do hope that I’ve given you some good ideas to experiment with. Remember, I’m completely GENERALISING here. Believe it or not, there are more ‘man categories’ than the ones I’ve discussed e.g. chav, adrenaline-junkie, loner, metro-sexual, surfer… the list is endless! Bottom line, take into consideration who he is, what he does, where he lives and how easy he is to manipulate. In a nice way obviously! 😉